Letting Go and Loving (Guest Post - Jackie)

It is my pleasure to introduce another excellent guest blogger. Jackie Pack is a licensed clinical social worker and although her blog simplecourage has only been online a month, the writing reflects years of wisdom in both walking her own path of authenticity, and helping others walk their own. I was once accused of thinking like her and I took it as a gracious compliment.

My Ability to Love
 Is Greater than any 
Wound I will Experience

Life is challenging…I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s supposed to be.  I believe that every person struggles and nobody is exempt from difficulties.  I believe that people do their best with the skills they have and that the world breaks everyone. 

There was a time in my life when the idea of getting married and bringing children into this world created a lot of anxiety.  I didn’t feel capable of bringing a child into a world I knew could be so harsh and cruel and helping them navigate through it.  Fortunately for me, my husband isn’t the kind who gives up easily and loved me until I felt safe enough to love him back.  Three years after we were married, our first of four daughters was born.  Suddenly, the world seemed a different place; what was once harsh and cruel now seemed to hold such beauty and hope.  I had no idea that this level of love lived inside me.  I loved seeing the world through my daughter’s eyes as they made each new discovery; the feel of grass on bare feet for the first time, figuring out how to sound out words or mastering that multiplication problem.

My daughter’s ages now span from 17 years to 10 years old.  They’re old enough to have experienced heart break.  To learn for themselves that life can be cruel.  One of the lessons I hope they are also learning is best summed up by Pink:  “we’re not broken, just bent and we can learn to love again.”

I still get lost at times.  Unsure. Scared. Sad. I still have days where I need to be reminded to let go and to open up.  As I go through all kinds of feelings and experiences in my journey through life---surprise, delight, chagrin, dismay, betrayal and disappointment, I hold this question as a guiding light:  “What do I really need right now to be happy?”  What I come to over and over again is that only qualities as vast and deep as love, connection and kindness will really make me happy in any sort of enduring way.