Yesterday I got an email from a good friend offering support and encouragement when she saw that I was writing again. She also said that she hoped that during the time off I had taken she hoped I had spent some time focusing on things that I do well.... I do not always like when it happens, but I always know when something occurs that I am going to need to write about it. If I try and ignore those moments they dog me until I follow though. I have thought about it most of the day and even though it has made me horribly uncomfortable I am going to do my best to meet the challenge.
As I have been considering the idea of writing about and affirming my strengths it is somewhat distressing to me that it was at least as difficult, if not more so, than in being transparent about the areas where I struggle. It makes sense that if I am trying to write regular affirmations for my growth process that I would take time to also affirm my strengths, but I think several things make me resistant to the idea.
The first wall that I encountered was the feeling that talking about my strengths would come across as boastful or bragging. Although I have no trouble pointing out to other people their strengths, if I acknowledge my talents it makes me think that I might be judged by others as prideful or arrogant. The gremlins whisper, "who do you think you are?" Perhaps the key for me to counter this particular impediment is to remember that when I identify my strengths I do not do it to compare myself to others, but rather I am making a fair assessment of what talents I have to manage the circumstances and challenges I will encounter along my path. I believe that being aware of both my strengths and weaknesses makes me better prepared to deal with whatever I may face.
My second obstacle was identifying what my strengths actually are. I realized that I place far more emphasis and thought on my areas of weakness. It is easy for me to point out my flaws and shortcomings, but I could only come up with a couple of things that I could identify as talents. I recognize that I am not living in balance and judging myself fairly if I can quickly write volumes about what my faults are, but it takes me most of the day to come up with a few strengths. It felt embarrassing when I had to ask a few of my siblings to help me identify what they are.
Looking at why this proved to be a struggle for me has highlighted the importance of pushing through and doing this anyway. If I want to make positive growth and changes that will help me reach my full potential, it necessitates my ability to recognize and use what talents I have to help me towards that goal. I think that it also allows me to see how I can be of service to others. I have benefited and relied upon the strengths of others in times of need and if I am clear about what my strengths are I can likewise reach out and be there for those in need of what I can offer. The following affirmations are my attempt to practice this. I would encourage you to consider your own talents. What are your personal strengths and talents? How might you affirm them and then make use of them for the benefit of yourself and others?
My teaching process provides safety for others to learn and instills confidence in their ability to succeed
I love to teach! Whether it is in the classroom, on a rock face, ski hill, or having a conversation with my girls I love the teaching and learning process. My sister pointed out that what she appreciates most from me is that she always feels more confident and capable of succeeding. That confidence helps her feel safe enough to make mistakes and try things that make her uncomfortable. This affirmation reminds me of the passion and love I have for what I do, and shows me how I can also use that to make improvements in the way I teach.
I listen with empathy and seek to understand others
Although interacting with others sometimes brings me anxiety it seems that it is fairly comfortable for others to connect with me. I think that my greatest strength as a friend is that I am willing to listen and that my intentions are to understand and support them in whatever they are experiencing. This affirmation reminds me of several areas where I can improve, but that my willingness to listen has been vital for me in building and maintaining the important relationships in my life.
I am a loving father
Although I know I frequently fall short in this area I can also affirm that I continue to show up as a father. I love my girls and I believe they can feel that from me everyday. I want to be better, but I know that what I am giving is also enough. I will never give up trying to love and teach them as best I can, even when my impatience, mishandled emotions, lack of sensitivity, or selfishness frequently tries to get in the way.
I have been able to identify a few other strengths but I think for the purposes of this post, and the increasing level of my discomfort this should suffice! Own your awesomeness!
It is so good to see you own your awesomeness! You have many more strengths than this short list that you have started with, but I hope that you realize that if this is the foundation upon which you are built it is a pretty strong place to start. Love you!
ReplyDeleteYes!! You are awesome, and it's good for all of us to be able to own and celebrate what our strengths are, especially when we take the opportunity to share them with others.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the uplifting post!
Having a hard time recognizing strengths in ourselves is something we all do to a degree and I have to admit I am on the lower end of the spectrum.
ReplyDeleteI would like to also afirm that you are good at listening with empathy and understanding. You have a way of making people feel better. I know in my interactions that I have never felt judged by you.
One major strength that sticks out to me is that you are able to summarize seemingly complex issues and make them simple to understand. You have brought light and clarity to situations where I was struggling to make sense.