To Do (Guest Post Ruth)

I am grateful to have another guest post by my sister Ruthie. Her contributions here and the support she has selflessly offered me is invaluable. 

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I am working on the framework to strengthen my family

I was at my sister's house a couple of days ago and noticed her To Do list on the kitchen table. Less than a week earlier, I was at another sister's house and saw her To Do list as well. It's been a while since I made my own list of things to do, and I've forgotten how much it helps to write down the things I want to accomplish each day.  Without a list I'm still likely to be as busy as I would be with a list, but the difference is the satisfaction and peace of mind I enjoy when I check off the things that need to be addressed the most. I'm not sure why I do it, but I find that I push aside and procrastinate doing the things that should be a higher priority.

I have always considered myself to be a fairly organized person, but when my boys entered the picture, I noticed that I started losing my edge. We don't have a very strict lifestyle as far as regular mealtimes or normal daily routines. I always figured that stuff wasn't as terribly important as a reliable bedtime. I realize now that it is. I had one of my boys screened for ADHD, and he does appear to have the disorder. The doctor recommended that I do the very things I've not been doing...structure our days and give him a stable routine with consistent discipline. 

I am intimidated with the task of creating a standard routine, and I'm still resisting and struggling with the idea. Just when school is ending for the boys' cousins and friends, and summer is approaching with so many fun activities in store for them, I'm faced with the task of tightening the reins instead of loosening up. 

I have to keep in mind that structure isn't a bad thing and that it will help my son and in return help me and my sanity. Just as a building relies on its foundation and framework, I realize that we need the same kind of stability. It may take me some time to find what works for us, but a daily To Do list will help me get there and keep me focused on the things that are the most important right now. We can still enjoy the summer and all the fun it holds, but the trick will be to discover how to balance that fun with the structure we need to create.

Ruth L.
www.snuglyfriends.com

!@*# & Ice cream

I take time for what matters

A few months ago I taught my oldest child curse words.  She just started first grade and she had several times asked about what the bad words are.  My thinking was that it would be better for her to hear them in context, understand what they mean, and some reasons for not using them rather than have them come from a classmate.  I can still recall an experience in sixth grade when I spent most of the day calling everyone a bastard because I had heard it on a movie and thought it sounded cool. 

I decided to take her out on a daddy-daughter date and get some ice cream so I could answer all of her curse word related questions.  She started by asking what the A word was.  I told her what it was, explained what it meant and why it is a swear word.  She seemed to be enjoying it and next asked what the B word was. I had to explain to her after a few letters that their isn't a curse word for every letter in the alphabet.  We went and made our own ice cream concoctions at the store and then headed home.  It probably only lasted 30 minutes but she has brought up our "ice cream trip" many times since that day and colored several pictures for me to hang in my office. 

It is nice having a little time off for the holidays.  I often catch myself looking forward to breaks and making big plans for all of the things I want to do.  In a flash the break is over and I find that I spent far too much time playing words with friends or something else that I can't remember a day later.  Taking 30 minutes to create and experience, or connect with someone you love can make a lasting and powerful memory.  It almost seems like that time is enlarged and captured permanently in my mind.  Today I will take time for what matters.